I'm tired and have had a rough day...


I'm tired and have had a rough day and no one to really talk to about it all, please forgive me for my poor attitude, I've got a lot on my mind.

I've recently had several friends get into accidents, car accidents, one is recovering, but he was in a coma for a long time, its going to take longer for him and he may never be 100%. Another friend of mine was also in a car wreck and almost died, his car flipped and went off a steep embankment. Today, I learned a friend of mine in Florida is in the hospital because of a car wreck.

I've had my share of wrecks and my friends know this and I've talked to them about stretching themselves thin, burning the candles at both ends you know and then trying to drive, but people get careless.

I had the day off today, but no one to really talk to, so I just went and thought about it all day. I ran my errands, got my oil changed, a hair cut and went by the grocery store. All the while my friend is still in the hospital fighting for his life, we've got mutual friends and I'm just waiting on the word about him. I tried calling his Dad, but I didnt get a response. I hope he's okay.

Its all of that, plus a whole lot of other things that I'm dealing with, everythings wrapped up in my head and I'm just trying to find a constructive way of dealing with it. Trying to remain positive in the face of it all, smile in the face of it all.

Then I came home this evening to find my parents in the kitchen talking to an insurance salesman about life insurance policies, mortality, life expectancy and all that mess. that was the icing on my cake for the day.

I dont like thinking about that, but I know I should, its something that should be planned for and taken care of well in advance. I know I'm covered, but I never really thought about my parents. You don't think about them in those terms. you know what I'm saying? I have my brother to think about too, how will he be taken care of if my parents pass, I'm sure my sister would take him in, but that would be an added burden on her again. There are so many things to think about, to factor in, none of us know how much time we have on this earth, we should all make the best of it.

A good friend of mine's mother recently passed. She's older, my friend, and her mother was battling cancer so in a way this, as she said, was for the best, but I know how its affecting her. I know she's not holding up well and there's not a whole lot I can do to help her.


there is more going on, a lot more, but I've already dumped a load on you and I know its getting late. I'm sorry I shouldnt have done that, I appreciate you all, I really do. The people in my life, my friends, family and others, they all mean a lot to me, they are my strength. They are who and why I've sacrificed so much for and when they hurt, I hurt. I love you all deeply.